Also, this whole new lifestyle thing is...difficult to manage...
I moved to dc like...a month ago? for grad school...after saying goodbye to as many people as I could and writing out the list of people who were pissed at me for not saying goodbye...i packed up everything for Excel and DC and left. I am not totally sure I know why I left...I know that I am supposed to be a pastor...did I leave for the right reasons? idk...nor will i ever...But im here and trying to remember that every morning i wake up.
Dont get me wrong...I loveeeee dc...and I loveee grad school and the people im living with and this is all such an incredible blessing. It was just sooooooo much change at once. I know no one down here and that was overwhelming. Almost everything I have done from little changes to big huge lifechanging changes I have had at least one thing be consistent...I now have nothing...I have different friends...different daily routine...different classes...different expectations put on me...different...everything.
I won't lie and say its always awesome because I do feel alone sometimes and that scares me...I do have one friend back home that I talk to often and always make sure we stay in touch...whether through sports talk telling her about my classes or boy issues we try and make it like I never left. that helps a lotttt.
I need help with almost everything in the sense that its hard for me to go do anything on my own thats without of walking distance...I had to ask for help to find the Verizon store just to pay my phone bill...I still havent been to the grocery story and only know how to get to and from school on the metro...which is a subway...which i hate tunnels and enclosed spaces...but wont use the bus because it a long walk...Right now...my day to day routine...consists of going to school and studying and drinking coffee...on sundays i go to church and I eat occasionally...i dont sleep except on thursdays for two solid pass out drool filled hours...right after i get home from class...
The good news is I fly home on the 1st and go and participate in Chrysalis. Im soooo excited to go home...I wont lie I have a couple times I have to speak at home which is...awesome because it makes me feel like Im still needed some place for something.
i am getting really close with my semi sort of half roommate...its cool cuz we have the same lat name....so we say we're long lost cousins or something ridiculous...
I made this blog so long ago...but the title...rings true...Im doing it...everyday im living for you....im trying anyway...and I think moving down here and living where I do and having the lifestyle i do helps...I dont have all the outside influences I did in undergrad...its pretty much just a me and god fest...and we're tryin to have not so much hate in our love hate relationship...its...tough...
I wish I had something inspiring or really awesome to say...but i dont...other than...stop wasting everyday...we have no less days to sing gods grace than from the first day we were born...you may not be here tomorrow. So don't act like you know you will be. You're not in control. The one who made you is.
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